There are so many things going through my mind these days.
So many new connections, as well as thoughts on our pandemic lack of human connection, are coming at me rapid fire.
And then there was that whole solar eclipse WTF.
DID YOU SEE IT? WILD! I can’t stop looking at all of the photos online. I don’t know that I’ll ever get sick of looking at that ring of shadow and light.
Don’t know about you but that affected me so deeply. There’s no doubt I’ve been moved at a level that I know will not be fully realized for many years. It’s just not to be wholly known yet.
There are so many unknowns right now. So much personal and social uncertainty.
Also, so much possibility.
It’s a Tower of Babel moment as the information age (finally) delivers stories and images of lives outside our own bubbles, forcing us to see and acknowledge that there even is a bubble. That our lived experience is wildly different than that of other people and that so many, maybe even all, of the stories we have been taught or have formed through assumption and myopia are lies. It’s painful and disconcerting. It’s possible our brains are only now evolving to a place where this kind of comprehension is possible. Whatever is happening it’s imperative for any kind of future of peace that we step up and answer the call to listen though.
Social blindness has to end if we want a future of more connection than isolation.
And we need a holy metric ton of personal support to get there.
Both support from people as well as support from the planet.
There is infinite power in our bodies and minds to shift our personal and cultural reality. There’s also real limits of accessibility and discord in monetizing support which, in my opinion, *should* be woven solidly into our ordinary life.
Dollars for feedback, for love, for allyship, for quality interactions in shared spaces is counter fucking intuitive for social, tribal creatures. And yet, here we are. As we move through the epic structural and universal transitions of this time-space expansion, we are tasked with being both a part of the current systems, as well as being able to function beyond them in order to reinvent them.
We are tasked with being squarely inside some very cacophonous liminal spaces before we are able to fully coalesce.
We are tasked with using what we have. Right now.
So gather your friends and your family if you have them. Open your mind and heart to the possibility of alternatives if you don’t. Take stock of your situation. Perhaps it’s time to enroll professional support to fully realize your own care and caregiving potential.
Remember, no matter where you find yourself, planetary support is still here, and matters.
Learning to have a relationship with the non-human sentience of the planet will serve us all. It’s as easy as recognizing, and using, the ground to walk on, sit on, lay on, noticing and acknowledging the trees that hold us, the plants to feed us, and the plant medicines that heal us. The earth is here with air to breathe and water to drink. And, yes, I understand there are even accessibility issues with these things which makes my point even more salient. If you have unimpeded access to this stuff… wake up to it, honor it by using it. The earth is always here, and in a way, that makes her invisible. We look past the trees, we look ahead of ourselves, not always at the ground we walk on. Our perspectives are often firmly focused on the things our core narratives of personal productivity and monetary accumulations have taught us were important.
We can practice paying attention to the natural world, practice remembering again and again. We can learn to see the forest for the trees, and vice versa.
The time to return, recalibrate, and re-story all of the lies of “leaders” who didn’t have humanity’s best interest at heart is here now.
We’re learning. And re-learning. Patience is also paramount.
For years now, I’ve been teaching people how to use high vibrational foods and supplements to upgrade low energy. I’ve taught people that sleeping is one of the most important exercises. I’ve taught people to say no gracefully, to guard their energy effectively, how to manage stress and suffering and carry on. I’ve given thousands of permissions to be regular human versus some unrealistic, inflated idea of what many people have been led to believe it takes to be enough. The work of coaching continues to be so fulfilling.
And I’ve recently added cannabis to my arsenal both personally, and professionally, and for now, my full immersion to learn that medicine has it at the forefront of my social media conversation.
But it’s not really the *most important* thing.
It’s important in its own right, as an intelligent herbal medicine, and nourishing food, that deserves a fair trial and much respect. It’s important because it’s prohibition is actually connected to mass incarceration of people of color, the destruction of families, and the loss of countless lives to diseases. The reality of what has gone into prohibition has tendrils in so many of society’s ills that doing reparations is of profound importance. Reparations to our relationship to the plant, and to all of the planet, as well as the reparations that are owed to so many for so many reasons.
I’ve come to understand that cannabis has been an important part of our food supply for so long, that its nutrition feeds a whole system, the endocannabinoid system which is responsible for the homeostasis of all other systems, and its hundred-year removal has caused a malnutrition in our bodies and minds. There’s reason to believe that cannabis is not “curing” all the illnesses as much as it is restoring us to a state of self-healing and steady regulation, by providing nutrition that is missing in a starved system.
Because of my own incarceration, and the prison service work I’ve done since, I have much experience in being in on the forefront of de-stigmatization and checking the status quo of whether being illegal makes something immoral, or if immorality and the legal system actually have a more warped intersection.
All to say: An unquestionable sense of alignment connects me to this work.
So it’s a focus. And, likely, will be a focus for me for as long as it holds this much power and this much hope. Until it’s as neutral as goddamned kale, I’ll likely be talking about it.
But at the end of the day, IT’S STILL JUST ANOTHER BRIDGE.
All cures are bridges to live, not life itself.
It’s crucial that we find what medicines, foods, forms of movement, stillness, and spirituality work best for us, while still having bigger, deeper conversations that include the infinite different ways that other folks will find their freedoms if we really want what we say we want our lives to be.
It’s crucial that we comprehend a world supported by systems that allow access to the natural world for all of her inhabitants. We are more than people in a family, or a city, or a workplace… we are people on a planet. We are animals that are neither lording over, or separate, from any other life force here. We are a literal part of plants and animals and soil. That’s our truest community.
I’m so grateful to be having these conversations with my coaching clients, my private holistic cannabis group, my son, my closest friends, the Magical Radical Retreat that’s happening this weekend, the Ellementa Group for women and cannabis, and as much as I can in my Instagram stories and feed.
These conversations, as well as these medicines, are changing the way I want to do many things including making money. (Maybe faster than those options are available to me.) It’s changing how I feel about selling. It’s changing how I think I should present myself to you. To be fair, I’ve always been kind of honest to a fault in my writing. I’ve always struggled with “sales”. But now, more than ever.
It’s not easy being a one woman show in every department of living. Maybe it’s because my son is finally old enough to have the kind of autonomy that means sometimes I don’t see him for days that I am really able to comprehend what it is I’ve just done. Years of being alone during the meltdowns, the decisions that had no simple answers, the sequential movements around the house of triage and maintenance, and navigating all other and situations with one lens: Survive.
I’ve been doing “fake it until I make it” for so long that I finally just started to feel like I was faking it.
What does “making it” even mean?
I am moving through a powerful transition out of a life-long anxiety and depression that I never thought would lift and I just don’t want to fake it in any way at all anymore. I’m tired of living on scraps of faith and fumes. I’m tired of believing in the bootstrapping story of all dreams can come true if you just work and believe hard enough. I am not better than you. I am not privy to information that you aren’t. We are the same with a different set of skills. I am no guru, I am a guide.
And, I AM willing to shut up and show up until there’s a better way.
Because I want real community, real abundance, real medicine.
I want that for us all.
And I’m willing to admit that I have no idea what that means. I am a coach. I am great at being in the process. Where we will end up will always be the unknown. We’re lucky that way.
And more than anything, more than ever before, I feel a more solid embodiment of myself as a space holder, a healer, a mother, a person who has the skills to recognize and translate disparate patterns of thoughts and behaviors into actionable practices of gentleness and peace. I’m anxious to deliver that respite to you.
I don’t want to teach you how to be a person who will come to identify as “healthy” or “high”. Instead, I want to hold your hand and reflect your humanness for long enough to help you be a person whose wellness, whose elevated state of connection, whose access to joyful states, even amid frustration or uncertainty, are the foundation that becomes so obvious to you that *it* becomes invisible, systemic even.
I’m ok if these are things we have to practice re-learning.
I want you to be able to see your life as rich and full as well as full of opportunities for expansion and revision.
I want to help you find yourself in this greater space of uncertainty and uncover the ability to weather it with more grace than judgments, more elegance than ignorance.
I want to help you hold steady during these transitional times, help you create systems and practices that support your most basic needs for energy, rest, and sustainable hope, help you rev up for revolt and power down for recovery.
And you don’t even have to smoke weed to do that work with me!
(Though, I’m delighted to help you navigate the world of cannabis as cure if you are able to legally do so.)
What is most important here, is that we are able to come together in any of the ways that are available to us. For me and you, that’s these writing interactions, and working together.
Are you ready to prioritize yourself as a servant of the greater good and do the work to create a container of success for all who seek your wisdom?
Are you ready to feel grounded, capable, less fragile, and free?
Are you ready for that physical, mental, and emotional boost over the proverbial fence?
I have space in my private practice for a few folks who are really ready to take the next step. And the next. And the next.
Let’s do a thirty-minute discovery call to see if we’re a good fit! Schedule here!I’m also open to letting more people into the Holistic Cannabis Group. It’s been so much more awesome than I even imagined and would love to get as many people in as I can. It’s donation based and packed with information that is both easy to access and easy to get caught up on. It’s super self-directed, so new people will fit in easily. Go here if you want to be a part of it – we have two more months of learning together – which is more than enough time for you to participate fully.Pay and sign up here!
Your health really is your greatest wealth. It will keep you in the game.
We need it because we can’t give in or give up. We just can’t. There’s still way too much beauty to quit.